Go to living together changes the dynamics of a couple. This is an important step that must be well thought out and must be wanted by both parties. If this has not happened before, it will surely happen after the wedding ceremony. The idea is great: you can finally be with your partner all the time you are at home, you can sleep, wake up, eat, watch things together without worrying about disturbing other roommates or parents. However, living a person on a daily basis can be difficult because you don't always find yourself aligned emotionally, with goals or desires. Seeing you every day, some things may fail, while others will surely be reinforced. It is legitimate to ask if there are rules of coexistence that make it infallible. In this article we will try to give a reply and some useful tips.
Choosing the house for coexistence
For living well together serves the good house. It is true that the house to live in after marriage is often a house that can be affordable economically or that offered by the circumstances. In the event that one of the two future spouses had a clean house adapted to the needs of the couple or a bequeathed property, it would be absurd not to take advantage of it given the current economic difficulties. However, if you don't have any special constraints, it would be good to choose the love nest together. In fact, we should look for a "neutral" place that he has not absorbed the personality of one of them, but that he is ready to welcome them both. A virgin ground on which to build your life together with shared and individual spaces. It is said a lot that after the honeymoon the new married life finally begins. So, we need a new home! Obviously, it would be better to dispute the ownership and share the costs even when you are married.
How to manage money by living together?
The “money” argument may seem a bit out of place when it comes to love. Certainly, it is not among those that we would attach toideal romantic wedding and couple. However, it is important that you have business discussions in a relationship, especially when you are married. On the other hand, even if we don't like to admit it, money is the basis of our survival and is often the source of quarrels and misunderstandings. So, better to be clear right away. It is important that everyone has their own economic independence but, at the same time, we have to share some of what we have seen that a lot of expenses are common. Let's take out the groceries, the bills, the couple's lunches ... it would be absurd to divide everything! How to do? Keep bank accounts separate and create a common pot to be completed at the beginning of each month. Establish together the amount that each will put in: you can choose to divide by two or divide the share in proportion to the resources of each. Use the money in this fund for all expenses related to the house and your life as a couple. There are many applications that can help you manage your home economically.
Together or divided?
It is important to share moments together throughout the day. At the basis of a good coexistence (but one could say "of a good relationship") there is dialogue. You must communicate with confidence and find things to do together to strengthen the bond of the couple. It would also be good to try to avoid the routine by always coming up with new ideas to make life happen together. However, it is also important preserve their spaces. Ideally, each of the two should have their own room in the house where they can keep their things and have the opportunity to express their individuality. If this is not possible, you may be happy with some corners of the house. In addition, you both need to maintain your relationships with your friends, even regardless of the couple. We don't always go out as a foursome or with a lot of other couples! Find ways to nurture relationships, even on your own. Maintaining your independence will help you make the most of your moments as a couple.
Precisely in the name of individual independence and individuality, try to respect your privacy. Even if you are married and live together, you don't have to share everything 100 %. If one of the two wants to keep their social media or phone passwords secret, it's a good idea to let them. Not because you have to do something wrong, but just to respect the other person's limits.
Who takes care of the cleaning in the house?
We are now in 2021 and the idea that the housework is gender-related it should be obsolete. This is not always the case in practice, but it is important to continue working so that little by little there is no longer the argument that the woman should take care of the household while the man is at work. Why not divide the tasks? If either of you is more into cooking, they can take it upon themselves to do it regularly while the other does the dishes or serves. You can set up cleaning crews or do them together to make operations much faster. If neither of you is good or particularly willing, you might consider hiring a co-worker to take care of the house.
How to argue while living together
Letting go of an argument or getting sidetracked to let off steam is more difficult when you live together. By sharing the same spaces, you don't have the opportunity to sleep on them and talk about it the next day without always being in touch with the problem. However, this condition can be good for the couple because it can make you talk more, better, and find more. compromise. Remember, they are the basis of a good relationship. Neither should please the other in everything to the detriment of what he wants for himself. But, through comparison, the happy medium can be found.
Good coexistence depends on love
At the basis of a good coexistence, there is love. It seems almost trivial to say, but it is important. Only the great affection you feel for a person can make you accept them even for their flaws, get excited about the time spent together, work hard to improve the relationship. Love should be cultivated with commitment, but when it's there it certainly makes everything easier. It is magic.